Wednesday, January 6, 2010

well, it's finally happened

my daughter has started "sleeping through the night". it isn't truly all the way through (aka 12 hours), but it sure isn't up every 2 hours! HALLELUJAH! thank you Lord that it's happening now, before i have to go back to work. she's sleeping at least 6-7 hours in a row, and then anywhere from 3-5 hours in a row after that. this i can deal with. i'll even continue feeding her once  a night when i go back to work - it feels like nothing!

speaking of work...i go back February 1st. <sigh> i have very mixed emotions about it all. first of all, i don't have daycare yet, and that makes it worse, cuz i'm anxious about finding some. i have a couple leads, and several back-up "babysitters", but nothing firm. i gotta call some people tomorrow.

i'm nervous about having enough energy to work. i'm nervous about finding my nouns again (will they ever come back??!!??) so that i sound intelligent. i'm worried i won't be able to balance work and home life. i'm scared i won't be able to do it. i'm scared i'll miss so many exciting things that R will do. i'm afraid i'll get sucked into more work than i'll be able to manage. it's such a HUGE change. oh yeah - and i'm going to miss my naps LOL. hopefully my sleep debt will get reduced this month. <sigh> i am very conflicted. i never thought i'd say this, but i don't think i'd mind too much if i had to stay at home with her and not work.

that being said, i am only going back part time. and i'm going to tell her at night, not to do anything exciting at daycare - aka, pull to stand, take her first steps. :P

so, if you pray, pls keep me in yours, about work. thanks y'all! <3